|DC:||Wonder Woman is too difficult to find a movie audience for-|
|Marvel:||YO YOU LIKE BLACK WIDOW? HERE SHE IS IN THE NEXT CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE WITH A TON OF SCREENTIME AND MAJOR ASSKICKING SKILLS|
|DC:||We can't allow the lesbians in Batwoman to get married in the comic, sorry.|
|Marvel:||HEY GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA FEATURE A GAY WEDDING ON THE COVER OF AN X-MEN ISSUE|
|DC:||The new direction for storytelling needs to be dark, gritty, mature and cynical.|
|Marvel:||DUDE CHECK IT OUT LOKI GOES SPEED DATING IS THAT NOT THE BEST SHIT EVER|
|DC:||After years of rumors, the Superman/Batman movie is finally coming, but with a new actor and suit for Batman and MAYBE a cameo from Wonder Woman.|
|Marvel:||PHASE 2 MOTHERFUCKERS EVERYONE IS IN EVERYONE'S MOVIE AND THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN US NOW|
|DC:||We can try to add maybe one or two 'people of color' to our lineup...maybe...|
|Marvel:||NEW MS MARVEL THAT'S MUSLIM AMERICAN, BITCHES.|
|DC:||We feel no problem with Batman's vengeful personality being like wet cardboard.|
|Marvel:||NEW LATINA GHOST RIDER WHO SEEKS VENGEANCE WHILE TAKING HIS AWEET LIL BRO FOR ICE CREAM|
|DC:||We can't mention any superhero titles in our movies, that's ridiculous.|
|Marvel:||FUCK YEAH YOU WANT A RACOON VOICED BY BRADLEY COOPER WITH A GIANT GUN? YOU WANT VIN DIESEL PLAYING A TREE? AMY FUCKING POND PLAYING A SEXY BALD SPACE PIRATE? HERE YOU FUCKERS GO|
|DC:||Our fanbase is mostly white males, I'm sure our focus is-|
|Marvel:||NEW SHE HULK LINE WHERE SHE GOES TO COURT THEN SAVES NEW YORK|
|Marvel:||NEW FEMALE THOR|
|Marvel:||NEW BLACK CAPTAIN AMERICA|
|Marvel:||TAKE ALL THIS COOL SHIT MARVEL BE OUTIE|
I JUST BURNT MY HAND ON MY LAMP TRYING TO TURN IT OFF LAMPS SHOULD NOT BE HOT ENOUGH TO GIVE YOU THIRD DEGREE BURNS THIS IS BULLSHIT.
maybe if you’d go outside and used natural sunlight instead of running your lamp for 13 hours straight, this wouldn’t happen :)
OH I’M SORRY IT’S 3:38AM LET ME JUST WAKE UP THE SUN SO I CAN SIT OUTSIDE WITH MY SKINLESS BURNT HAND AND BASK IN THE GLORY OF NATURAL DAYLIGHT.
Call me at 4 am, and tell me it’s because you want to hear my voice.
|straight couple:||*make out in public at random intervals in weird places*|
|straight couple:||*grabs each other's asses in public*|
|straight couple:||*are not in any way inconspicuous about the fact that they are feeling each other up in public*|
|gay couple:||*holds hands in public*|
|straight people:||that is VILE and it is CORRUPTING my entire FAMILY. my grandmother is crying. my children have all shit their pants at the same time. WHO WILL THINK OF THE CHILDREN|
You know when a fast angry song comes on that you know every word to and you’re in just the right mood that your eyes light up with the fire and angst of a thousand punk rockers and you just feel so alive
I would just like to say fuck you to everyone who made me feel inadequate growing up and ruining my self esteem for years. You all suck and I’m glad I don’t talk to any of you any more.